ode to the flower girl

over the weekend, having found true love, jennifer's brother (jeff) swapped vows and spit and ran headlong into marital bliss. the bride was quite fetching, the groom dashing, and we hope they live happily ever after. yadda, yadda, yadda..

the BIG news of the day was the flower girl. not in the turbulent history of flower girls has there been a more fitting lass to wield the flowery basket. she was absolutely resplendent in her black and burgundy dress. her hair flawlessly dooed-up for the occasion and her antique faux diamonds sparkled like a fat man's eyes at an all-you-can-eat buffet. her concentration was phenomenal; right foot together, left foot together, right foot together.. and her pedal placement impeccable. never before have plastic rose pedals looked so natural on a scape of tissue walkway. yes, tears were shed. i was proud. we all watched in awe as she glided down the aisle like an artist on canvas.

it was a beautiful day and thankfully, this will be the biggest role sarah will play in a wedding for a long, long time. she and i have a gentlemen's agreement that there will be no boy talk for at least 25 more yrs. we have agreed that boys are stupid, they stink, and for the most part, utterly worthless. much better to stay home and practice the ancient art of making french toast (with dad) or stomping the soup out of the Annoying Trio (brothers) with her tag team partner (dad again).we have way too much to do without throwing stupid boys into the mix..

ok. realistically, i know, one misbegotten day some poor sap will inevitably find the nerve to cast his shadow upon our door with a notion of romance. some clammy-handed cad with pimples and poetry trying to finagle some time with my little girl. and who knows, in a quarter century or so, maybe we will invite him inside...(or maybe we'll just bodyslam him).

the deck adventure II

so we have spent about 3 full days working on the front deck. what have we learned? number one: a composite deck system goes together much easier when it is designed into the initial house plans. this rang true when we realized the distance between our front columns is about 7' and our rail sections are only 6'. number two: those crazy guys at Lowe's know less than i do about composite decks (scary). they had no options to 'fix' my findings, only that they could special order 8' rail sections for around a zillion bucks apiece and it would take weeks to get them in. oh well. we decided to add posts between the columns and trim our 6' sections. (a little more work; but a lot faster and cheaper.) so, with the help of the 'crew' (jeremiah, brad, christian, elijah) the extra posts have been set and the decking laid. we have also decided to widen the front steps from 4' (what the plans called for) to 6', giving a more inviting look to the porch. as it turns out, to widen the steps means adding more support which means digging a couple more post holes (lucky jeremiah). at this point, we have abandoned the initial deck plans and are now free styling it.

as the temperature holds around the mid 50's this coming week, we hope to get alot done. with cold weather coming, i expect jen to soon recall my underage labor force (christian and elijah). we've already been cited for not wearing our winter coats (way to go, elijah) and instigated safety concerns when christian fell off the access plank. (smooth move, grace). of course, we stood tall and reminded mom that we were men, and men fall off things and laugh at the cold...(she just looked at us like we were clumsy and stupid, told us to put our coats on and be careful.) undauntedly, we plod on. the deck adventure continues. and we breathe in the cool air, mock the splinters and sawdust and revel in our manhood... at least until mom shuts us down.

Fun with Chuck

so when jeremiah told us he wanted to celebrate his 17th B'day at Chuck E Cheese, we were a little concerned. when he assured us his decision was totally unselfish and based solely on the fact that the "kids" would have a great time, well, we were still a little skeptical. nevertheless, we went to party with the "big rat". after reviewing the following pictures, i now feel really awful that i questioned jeremiah's selfless act. it is so obvious he did not enjoy himself in the least. what a total act of love and kindness to sacrifice his one special day for the pleasure of his little nieces and nephews.

WHATEVER!

this guy was like a fun sponge, soaking up all the good times. he was skipping from game to game tossing tokens and giggling like a schoolgirl at recess. i even tried to pry him out of one game pod (to give the children a chance to play); but my attempts were useless. nothing could stand in the way of this good-timing man. the only time he wasn't hogging the games, was when we found him chugging orange pop and dancing with the band. (nice robot moves, by the way)

luckily, i was then able to snap some pictures of the kids:

but for the most part, the kids got stuck watching their uncle have all the fun.

HAPPY BURFDAY MIAH!!
maybe next year, we'll hit the Sesame Street on Ice. i'm sure the "kids" would love it too..nudge, nudge, wink, wink..

Two steps to Manhood

there are two distinguishing mile markers in every (redneck) man's life. a coming of age, if you will. one is waking to find that first, long, black hair growing out of your back (fortunately, this comes much later in life and can usually be held at bay with tweezers). the second, is the day you get to shoot a gun.

a friend of mine is an avid hunter. he has a large family and they eat alot of game. while visiting the other day, he asked me if christian was old enough to help him 'sight-in' one of his rifles. so, christian, dave and i took a four-wheeler ride to the target range. now christian is a very laid back cat. nothing really gets him too excited; but i could tell he was loving this. dave spent some time explaining how a rifle works and the do's and dont's in regards to safety. christian soaked it all in occasionally glancing over at me smiling.

finally, the time came. christian was shown how to position his hands, lean into the sights, and control his breathing. confidently, he clicked off the safety and squeezed the trigger. his first shot was about an inch above the bullseye. the second, a half inch above the bullseye. the third was in the black. my eyes teared up and my pride soared. out of 10 shots, 3 were in the bullseye and the rest were in a tight pattern around it.



afterwards, we retrieved the paper plate target and fished around in the grass until we found one of his .22 casings. christian said they would go in his 'special' box along with his other priceless treasures.


all in all, it was a fun day. a good childhood memory was made. and a good dad memory. i too will put it in my special treasure box (right next to my tweezers).

I AM YOUR FATHER.. Don't hit me there...

when jonathon requested a "star wars" birthday theme to recognize his 7 yr milestone, he figured the usual crew of brothers, sister, aunts, cousins and the like would show up. what he didn't expect were visitors from 'a galaxy far, far, away.. '

Princess Leia made her entrance with guns blazing and theme music booming. she passed lightsabres out to the squealing mob and instructed them to prepare for battle. she said there was a disturbance in the force (besides jeremiah's rank foot odor) and on cue, the doorbell rang. jonathon was elected to investigate.
Darth Vader entered with an armload of presents and was assaulted by a munchkin army of sabre swinging jedi.

after a barrage of chops to the head and groin, darth was allowed to stay and participate in the gift opening ceremony.

jonathon, dressed in his 'clone trooper' getup opened numerous gifts including a storm trooper room guard (thanks nana) and yes, the new xbox star wars lego game (thanks Pffiefer clan)!!! fun was had by all and after cake and more dueling, darth headed back to the death star mumbling something about wearing a cup next time.

the deck adventure

we have some friends that have built a home near us and asked me to build their decks. understandably, i drafted jeremiah, christian, elijah, and our friend's son, brad, to help. with all of your recent remodeling projects, maybe christel and darren will have some insight in the elusive art of installing a composite decking system. turns out, this composite stuff is a precise science, pretty expensive, and didn't come with instructions... there are countless boxes of metal hangers, multiple length fasteners and oddly shaped composite pieces.

sound like a train wreck in the making? probably; so i thought it would be a hoot to photo document our little project.

this first photo was suppose to be our "before" picture; but jeremiah decided to jump in and louse it up. the front deck will be 29'x10' with steps coming down from the front door. my first, you can't turn back now, episode began when i cut a 7" deep x 29' long section of vinyl siding from the front of their house.

second photo was taken 7 hrs later. we have now dug five post holes (chipped through rock is more accurate), set our 2x8 rim and dropped in the floor joists. (again, jeremiah finding his way into the shot, and yes, he is barefoot..) so far, injuries have been kept to a minimum, despite jeremiah running around with no boots on. a couple splinters and some sawdust in the eye was the worst. christian and elijah are having fun helping on their first building project, carrying lumber and learning to read a measuring tape.

i went by lowe's, looking for hobbits to question, and was directed to a brochure with some vague ChoiceDek installation instructions. maybe it will suffice. we will see soon enough..